There are some days that I want to dive into an ocean of dreams, drown in my hopes and dance as the swirling waves carry me away from this world. I sometimes covet freedom, and this brings me a sudden hunger, a longing to escape from reality and go somewhere secret, where I’ll be safe and sound, where all my neglecting thoughts and constant nightmares that chase me until I’m too tired to budge won’t find me. A place were I’m hidden and can allow freedom to resurrect my creativity…
I’ve been walking for a very long time, and I always seem to end just where I started. I’ve fallen into a web of confusion. I have no destination or idea of where I should go. All I know is that my feet won’t ever stop walking and my head won’t ever stop thinking. Due to my constant dreams my mind has blocked everything, turning my eyes into my only windows of communication.
I have opened a door and I now find myself surrounded by a lake where its waves have stopped dancing so that I can see my own reflection. I can notice my features, but they are a little blurry, distorted by the world’s definition of beauty. I’ve become the scarecrow, my brain is nothing but a labyrinth of unattended thoughts. My heart has turned into a void rock, because after all the obstacles that I have encountered in the way, all my reasonable judgement is now lost in the wind. I’ve become the tin woodman.
It’s as if all my feelings remained but they had lost its source. I’m just following my feet. Everyone is conscious of where they are going, except for me, I’m jut hopeless and disorientated. The unknown has been strangling me in fear, and now I’ve become the cowardly lion. I am nothing but a mixture of every creature’s disappointment, their dreams in a golden cage.
They told me to follow the yellow brick road, but where am I really trying to go?
They say that we have two choices: fight or flight. You can either oppose what they say and defend what your heart asks you to or try to avoid the subject and leave it behind, believing this is the safest media of protection. Sometimes flight might seem the most sane. But the truth is that your words that have stolen your lips but not your heart will torment you in an infinite cycle. Some people are satisfied with mediocrity, others with the extraordinary. I consider myself someone who analyzes a lot, and I usually conjecture whether we should truly be content with the ordinary, because for something to be ok it means that it’s not to the best of our ability. Why even bother doing something when it won’t even make us grow? …and on the other hand, why not do something that will make us feel proud, drool us in happiness? Some of us venture and try running away from our problems, when the truth is they will always come back to hunt us down and devour our minds until we finally chose to look at these creatures in the eye and tell them we refuse to live this way, we refuse to live in the fear of our own thoughts and abilities. Our hearts crave truth, and if we don’t say what we feel, then we are just talking but not saying anything. What’s the point in freedom if our words aren’t of truth and our acts aren’t illustrated by our own will?
So what would you chose, fight or flight?
Sometimes we are too dumb to notice the way we are wasting time. Time is an incredible force of magic. It’s the thief of beauty, the builder of knowledge and the lover of life. The problem is that it runs at a faster pace, and we usually never notice this. We are all stuck in our phones when the truth is real beauty can only be felt with the heart, not just seen through our eyes. Going out for walks and discovering new places is something I love doing. Nature has blessed us with fantasy and dreams. Today I went to an amazing place and realized that I want to take advantage of the simple wonders in life. I had a really relaxing and soothing day. I believe we should all embrace ourselves sometimes. Here are some pictures of my day. We should look up from our phones more frequently and enjoy the present. :)
I see you everyday, but do I know you? Have I dived into your thoughts for once? Have you submerged into mine? You seem allright, but I sometimes wonder whether you are tormented with your own thoughts. Or if you’ve inundated yourself in your own tears to reach a point of suffocation. Something in the way you smile makes me wonder. Your pseudo smile shows too much confidence, as if it were over-exaggerated to hide something. It looks as if you were perfectly fine. You act like you’re ok. But so does everybody else. Is there happiness behind your smile, or is it just there to reassure me that I’m wrong and everything is perfect? Is your heart still pumping blood? Maybe I’m just overthinking too much and everything is trully ok, but there’s something about your smile that makes me wonder…
I now find myself walking through the streets of Barranco in Lima, Peru and I have fallen in love with the secret messages hidden in every wall. Some say graffiti is pointless and doesn’t express anything. But to me it’s an incredible form of art filled with emotion, giving something such as a sidewalk a deeper meaning. Thank you artists.
Are human beings capable of cruelty? In my opinion there is no such thing as evil. Sometimes we use coldness as a source of distraction, or to make others feel bad because we believe that this will release weight from our loads. But in the end we are all victims of compassion, and possess an equal amount of good and bad… we’re balanced. Everything is not always pleasant, we need to walk through hell in order to acquire eyes that find everything beautiful. We need to drown to remember how good it felt to float. We need to asphyxiate in the burning lump inside our throats in order to crave the feeling of happiness filling our lungs. We all make mistakes, have regrets, love, laugh, smile, hate and envy, because we are human.
You observe, with those purple eye contacts. You smile, through your dipped-in-gold teeth. You talk, between thick layers of lipstick. What are you trying to hide?
You say something, but then regret it. You laugh, while your eyes frown. You come, and then abscond. What are you trying to hide?
I frequently find myself pondering whether love is an illusion illistrated by my mind, because every time this inevitable force drags me, I find myself infused with bruises. I wonder whether true love is profoundly possible, if two souls can really merge into one. Maybe I don’t want to face this magnet, and maybe I’m just making up excuses, hiding from love so that I’m not it’s next target. But I’m afraid that to me it’s just another illusion.